Thank God
for the inventor of the Keurig! Last
week our seven and a half year old coffee maker, a wedding present, finally
gave in to the pressure of being in a house with a coffee loving maniac like
myself. Gathered up a twenty percent off
coupon and managed to find a gift card we had for Bed, Bath and Beyond and sent
A.J. on his way. Alas, we are the proud
owners of a Keurig. It is awesome and
might actually be contributing to my bad coffee habits, but I am in love!
My usual Wednesday
chaos was even more so yesterday due to the fact that my mother-in-law was
sick(most likely due to the fact that she was here watching our kiddos Saturday
night in what I thought was a break from Germfest 2012). I had to drop the two middle boys at my
sister’s house so she and my mom could watch them while I taught my art
class. Then Bart and I, along with one
of my students who I drive to and from class each week, headed off to today’s
house. For those who haven’t read past
blog entries of mine, the group of girls I teach are homeschooled and so each
week we alternate to a different one of their houses. Well in the past I have ended up on one
occasion at the wrong girl’s house. This
week’s stroke of genius was that I could not remember the exact address of the
house. So there we are in the Gray Goose
and I am trying to determine which house was the correct one. This very incident should clearly illustrate
to all new home developers in this area that you really need to change things
up a bit. Street upon street of similar
looking houses does not help me. I ended
up having to call one of the moms whose daughter is in my class, not the mom
who was hosting today because I don’t have her phone number programmed in my
phone, but next time I will. I will also
remember the red door!!! And the bay
window- all subtle distinctions. Oh and
maybe I will remember the house number as well.
I spent most
of my day either driving to or from my sister’s house or hanging out with three
or all four of my kids there. My sister
and my mom later had the task of keeping all four of the kids for me so that I
could go to a memorial service. Thank
you, Yvette and Mom!!! It meant a lot to me!
Much of my pre-mommy life and some years of my post-mommy life have
revolved around working in hospitals.
Starting with one of my internships for my art therapy program in
college, I fell in love with working in hospitals and above all with working
with people in hospital settings. It is
such a weird concept for some people to wrap their mind around, but I know any
of you who have worked in a hospital or still do, can relate. Unfortunately working in a hospital brings
about one very painful occupational hazard and that is having to say goodbye to
some pretty awesome patients that you worked with.
I weaved the
Gray Goose through the backroads of Vienna to avoid the major annoyance that is
Tysons Corner where the Beltway and toll road and metro construction
collide. Hop on the Beltway near Gallows
and it was smoothsailing to the destination.
Making good time until I was around the corner from where the service
was and cars were starting to pour out and have to park along this very main
road. I ended up parking in a
neighborhood of townhouses a couple blocks away and booked it up the side of
this main road, praying that no car would hit me and also that my slightly
tight(thank you baby weight!) black pants would not split down the seam of my
butt as I was running to make it into the service. All the while I am thinking, what a testament
to this awesome kid’s life(well really young man as he was an adult now!) and
to his family. The service was
bittersweet- every bit of it was a reflection of who this kid was. Everyone who spoke managed to truly capture
his essence. He was a character. He was really one of a kind. He had a smile and laugh that still warm my
heart to think about. He was so clever
and had a hilarious sarcastic wit about him.
He loved his family. He loved his life and he was just so HAPPY. I had
the privilege of meeting him ten years ago when he was first diagnosed. Through my work at a cancer support program
and then with the Child Life department at the hospital he was treated at, I
was able to keep in touch with him and his family through the years. My work path hadn’t crossed him or his family’s
path in a long time, but I found out about him dying and wanted to show support
to his incredible family. I hate the
term paying respect- it sounds so formal.
I have decided I like “paying remembrance” better. Because that is really what you do at any
sort of memorial- you remember a person.
You show the family you remembered him and them. You share stories and memories of that person
and how special they were and always will be.
It was heartbreakingly beautiful to see how his siblings have grown
because in hospital work like in so many settings of “people” work you get to
know families as well. His parents are
still the amazingly strong couple and parents they always were. I was so glad I could see them after the
service and hug them and let them know how much I loved their kiddo. They love their kids more than life and you
can just feel it. Which is why it was so
much harder seeing them again in light of the fact that I now have my own kids. This family met me before I was even engaged
to A.J. There is so much time and
history there. Despite how sad I felt
yesterday and still feel, I know they will get through it and that it will be
hard, but they are tough and resilient and will carry each other through. And based on how many people were packed into
the service, have a world of support hugging around them.
There was
one very bright part of the day and that was getting to see another young woman
and her mom who I had worked with the same years I first worked with this young
man- sounds so funny to call her that as she was a cute spunky teen when I met
her. That bubbly teen beat incredible
odds and is now a grown woman, married with a beautiful baby of her own. Getting to talk to her and her mom and give
them huge hugs that say more than any words can, those are the tangibles that
get me by. She told me about getting to
see this young guy the night before he died and how he talked to her about Lady
Gaga. He was always so funny like that,
up on all the current events and never missing a beat.
I don’t mean
for this post to sound like a downer. It
shouldn’t. I just want people to realize
that all those hospital staff(Child Life Specialists, nurses, doctors, techs,
secretaries, hospital housekeeping, food services, the coffee cart people in
the lobby), they remember you and your children. They remember you whether you were there just
for a brief emergency room visit for your child to get stitches or whether your
child has been in and out of the hospital his/her entire life.
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