Rounding the bend of what has felt like the world’s longest
week for both me and A.J. He had better
be on a plane right now and I have warned him that during his layover in
Boston, he is not to get off the plane and attempt to go to Fenway Park. I may also have some police escorts meet him
at Dulles to ensure that he actually comes straight home. I don’t care if that would make him look like
some sort of felon.
Yesterday reminded me that every day as a parent is a
constant pendulum back and forth of totally awesome moments which bring about
super happy reactions, I’m on top of the world, I LOVE my kids and they are
perfect. Then instants later it swings
to the totally chaotic, I’ve had enough moments which bring out the not so
tactful, not so proud parent, I’m so close to losing it screaming loon in me. I had a great final day of my mini art
camp. Crazy, but great. We did sculpture, clay was all over the
counter, but it went perfectly. I had
finally given up on the fact that the middle boys would cooperate and stay in
the basement with the babysitter and thus set them up with playdoh at their
little Ikea table in the living room. I
breathed a huge sigh of relief as the last little girl was picked up, but I am
so excited to grow my “art studio” business and classes.
The afternoon brought about one more medical visit- as Josie
told me she had been sent to the nurse at school to check on her eyes which
were looking a bit pink. Maybe I jumped
the gun, but I just wanted to nip anymore infectious disease(if it really was)
in the bud. So straight from school to
the pediatrician’s office we went. I
joked to my sister Nikki that I hoped it was one of the docs or nurse
practitioners that I knew really well(which is all but the newest doctor and
that is like 10 people right there) because I had all the maniacs with me. Just my luck, it was the newbie. She was nice enough, but didn’t quite get my
crazy mom of four kids warped sense of humor and sarcasm or pleading in my eyes
like “would I really be here if I didn’t think it was necessary?”. Also she only has one kid so someday she’ll
get it. By some miracle, the kids were
beyond well behaved for being plunked in an eight by eight cell for Josie’s
exam. No pink eye- thank you, Lord!
Back home to decompress and took the troops outside to run around. Living on a corner has its benefits, however,
it also enables pretty much all my neighbors to get a running feed of my
parenting habits and a nice glimpse into our family. It does force me to try to tone things down
and keep a sort of picture of togetherness.
So we were enjoying the incredible spring evening and I did what I often
do and multitasking and calling A.J. to catch up on our days while letting the
kids conquer the yard. Due to the fact
that we are both fried from the week and almost every single phone conversation
has been interrupted, we managed to start arguing about who had it worse this
week(well in a nutshell it was that, but of course there was more to it). Again, so wishing we weren’t on a corner for
all the neighbors to get a glimpse of me arguing on the phone with my husband
who is across the country right now as I try to herd the children into the
house for dinner and gather the toys under the carport. Why is it that moments like that, the dog
decides to be nice and calm as people are walking by?! If only she could sense to bark when I am
trying to prove my points to A.J. in such a “vocal” manner. After this tense call, we apologized via
texts blah blah blah, gotta love modern technology. Almost 8P.M. and I gave up, dinner was a
gourmet feast of leftover cheese fries from Outback, nuggets for the kids and
dog(by default), seven layer dip, and some “hoppy” juice(beer) for me.
Good thing for a little mellowing for mama as the next step
was much needed baths for the kids.
Sawyer performs his usual water juggling which ends with me soaked and
the floor full of puddles. I am not
quite sure how, our fifty some year old floors have not caved in yet under the
bathroom. Bart decides that he is
starving and I feed him while sitting there watching the other three. He happens to get a mini bath just by being
in the room while the other three perform their synchronized bathing
routines. Now onto the drying
routine. This is one area where I miss
A.J.’s presence the most. The assembly
line of drying three children requires one parent to be on sprinkler duty
waiting with a diaper to wrap Sawyer in immediately and underoos to throw on
Jimmy. Sawyer and Jimmy sprint down the
hall tweaking their you-know-whats while shouting “Beep! Beep! Beep!”. Yes, I will be sure to mention that years
down the road to their girlfriends and wives.
Without my counterpart in the living room last night, I watch in horror
as Sawyer marks his spot not once, but twice on the living room carpet then
takes off from me leaping onto the leather living room couch(don’t worry I wipe
it down on a daily basis pretty much). After
cleaning the “spills”, I head down to
the basement with my goons so they can play while I throw the towels into the
washer.
I’ve given up on any bedtime routine this week and Josie
only has to make it through a half day before her Spring Break officially
begins so let the kids fall asleep on the living room floor and couch while
watching the Goodnight Show. Keep myself
awake as best I can because after bathtime Josie decided to pull her other
loose tooth and that means the Tooth Fairy needs to make her flight. Manage to make it to dropoff on time again
this morning, but am getting later each morning this week.
So now I am sitting here with the boys who had oreos for
breakfast. Don’t judge. I don’t do it
everyday. I am currently sewing Velcro to
one of A.J.’s pairs of running pants and
one of his long sleeve underarmor shirts.
Then I will be attaching the other parts of the Velcro to one outfit of
each of the kids. Upon A.J.’s arrival I
will have him change to his Velcro suit and attach Josie to one leg, Jimmy to
the other leg, Sawyer on his back, and Bart on his chest. See you next week, Hunky! I’m outta here!
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